El chico del teléfono

La ilusión es como un globo, cuanto más aire le insuflas, más crece; pero si te descuidas, se desinfla rápidamente y sólo queda una goma pobre y deforme. Eso nos ha pasado, o más bien, hemos dejado que nos pase. El otro día dijiste que me querías, por su puesto,no me lo tomé en serio en el contexto, pero sí de sentimiento. De todos modos, no fui capaz de responder, ambos reimos, pero después, silencio incómodo. En otro tiempo, sin duda, hubiera alimentado mis amorosos afectos. Ahora, te quiero, y sé que sólo es amistad. Ahora doy gracias a que nunca te he tocado, nunca te he mirado, nunca te he sonreido y no podamos hablar de momentos juntos. Me odiarias si hubiera descubierto tan tarde, que tú, aunque estás cerca, no eres lo que busco. Eres tan vulnerable, tan inmaduro, muchas veces irracional y carente de autocontrol y sensibilidad sobre ciertos temas, que no soy capaz de verte como un HOMBRE. Me duele que me canse tu actitud, que haya perdido las ganas de hablar contigo, en suma, tener la retorcida idea de abandonarte. Estas cosas, no son cosas que pueda confesarte, por eso, redescubriré el tiempo para llamarte. Mientras, sólo espero que no me descubras bajo mi manto de acero.

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Spark is like a balloon, the more air with you fill it, the more it grows; but if you're not careful, it gets deflate rapidly and there's nothing left but a poor and misshapen gum. That's what happened, well, we let it happen to us. The other day you said you loved me, of course, I didn't take it seriously in that context, but I did as a hidden feeling. Anyway, I wasn't able to reply, we both laughed, but then, an akward silence. There was a time, no doubts, when would have satisfied my loving affections. Now, I love you too, and I know it's jut friendship. Now I thank I've never touched you, I've never looked you in the eye, I've never smiled at you and that we can't recall moments together. I know you would hate me if I had found out so late, that you, despite you are closer, are not made for me. You are so vulnerable, so inmature, often irrational and devoided of selfcontrol and the sensibility I have about certain issues, that I just can't consider you as a MAN. It pains me to be tired of your behaviour, to have lost the interest in talking to you, basically, to have the devious idea of leaving you. These things, are things I strongly can't admit, that's why I will rediscover the time to call you. I just wish you won't uncover what it's inside my treacherous cloak.